I love when we are the only ones awake. x
Can I harness your mind beneath canvas and twine and play it like a drum? Would you care if the taps of my fingers echoed over your soul? I want to play it like an instrument because it makes the most beautiful sounds.
Will spite be the almighty chisel that wrecks us? Will you always go to bed bitter, my lad? Remember when we promised forever in the throes of our youth…pouring over the chicken scratch that was to be our future. Together we built it, note by note, until it crescendoed to nothing.
I think love is one of the most beautiful and best things in the whole world. Whenever I see it, I fill to the brim with warmth and want to kiss the first lips that I see.
Ocean Fright Love Poster Power Chair
I’ve tread these oceans before, my bones dank with fright
I saw your love on wanted posters
Such power you had when you stepped from that chair
Your shadow swings like a pendulum, marking your grave
Shake my dead bones, your heart’s broken in my hands
Kiss my blue lips, cold as the sea
Dig me a hole, buried deep and warm in mother’s arms
Girl, I’ve seen you before, seen you running like the wind
With a flask of father’s gin, running like you’ve murdered again
Don’t trip on your roots and choke on your sins
You’ve left home once again
Gone cold,gone cold
Mother, your baby’s cold in your arms
She’s fleeing like a horse across the desert sands
Leaving a track of spite in her path
Reckon we’ll see her again only when she’s dead
Some say you should have lost her in the womb
But you’ve always loved her like I do
Even when she freezes in my arms, the only ones she ever knew
I miss more things than I feel I have. Why is everyone fleeting? Why are hearts like sand? I will not know the answers to these questions but they will plague me for the rest of my life. Life is loss, comforted by the illusion of a warm body…a flicker of golden hair in the sunlight, brimming laughter from the lips of a lover. I miss my girls- the warmth of a woman’s breast beneath my palm, how soft their lips feel on my cheek. I am in love but never in love enough. Spending every waking moment in love is the only way to live. It’s quite terrifying, otherwise. But the hearts I used to carry are gone; save for a very precious few. I will scour the Earth in search of them, if only in my dreams. In my dreams I find them sometimes only to wake up to cold.
“I cannot stand small talk, because I feel like there’s an elephant standing in the room shitting all over everything and nobody is saying anything. I’m just dying to say, “Hey, do you ever feel like jumping off a bridge?” or “Do you feel an emptiness inside your chest at night that is going to swallow you?” But you can’t say that at a cocktail party.”- Paul Gilmartin